Do I want the life that's up ahead? or the one I left behind?

(The Final) HELLO!

  Considering myself to be a pretty stable person, I find it completely out of my character to have any kind of mental break down. I would say the closest I get is a mini panic attack, which I would describe as a flood of anxiety washing over me and consuming my very soul...? I've found in these moments the largest bucket to bail out all this excess stress, is when I rely on Gods promised gift of the Comforter. After being hit by one of these floods this week , with the realization that my world I've built up for the past 18-months would undergo some serious changes in the coming days, I turned to that Gift. I feel that there is no faster way to invite the spirit into my life than to pray and receive a priesthood blessing. I am grateful that in the area I now serve, I have 2 sets of elders whose priesthood I can call upon. After receiving a blessing from  my District Leader I remembered a poem that had brought me comfort once before. It was sent to me in a package from the youth in my home ward, but sadly was written by an anonymous author, entitled "the mission". It begins with a new missionary boarding a plane, after a tearful goodbye to their family and friends. Now alone with their thoughts the missionary asks a question that could be applied to anyone beginning a new adventure "Do I want the life that's up ahead? or the one I left behind?" Later we read of this same missionary, who has now come to love their time of service, once again boarding a plane. With tear filled eyes, they ask "Do I want the life that's up ahead? Or the one that's left behind?" 

 What a deep sense of peace filled my heart as I read and pondered this poem. I can't help but smile as I remember how anxious and inadequate I felt while beginning my first few months as a missionary. Now, all I feel is confidence and high levels of self worth as I know My Heavenly Father is pleased with the work I've done. My mission has been spent building up sandbags walls around my testimony so when Satan comes with "His mighty winds, yea his shafts in the whirl wind, yea, when all his hail and mighty storm shall beat upon,  me it shall have no power over me" (Helaman 5:12). I have been given all the tools and preparation for the rest of my life, I am a forever strong missionary of the California Fresno Mission and I want the life that's up ahead!

Love,

Sister Julie Anne LeStarge

Can You Talk?

As my Samoan companion would say,

TALOFA!! 

This week has been  hectic! Isn't every week that way as a missionary? Well this week has been especially hectic! I can't tell you how many trips we made to and from Fresno! It's been a busy driving week...which makes this sister tired! At one point we had to pull over and take a 10 minute nap because I was falling asleep at the wheel!! Dangerous stuff. 

 We received a wonderful training for all the missionaries training and being trained. We were given some wonderful counsel by President Clark (who I absolutely love!), and even had some break off time to meet as trainers and discuss how it's been going. As we went around the "power circle" I wasn't surprised to hear some trainers express their struggles in training (remembering how much of a brat I was to my trainer long ago). When it came my turn, I looked around the room and said "Well, I'm sorry you're all having struggles ,but my trainee is great!! The only thing I can't get her to do is correct me! and that's because she thinks I'm perfect!" (which I'm still trying to show her all of my countless flaws). It was a good discovery time though with all the other trainers, I learned there are a whole lot of things  I'm doing well, and even more things I need to change in order to see that Sister Maukeni has the best opportunities grow and improve. 

  At the end of the day I was standing next to a sister who carpooled up with us, ( one I love and adore and feel is probably a lost child of my parents) and we were talking to a set of elders sitting down. While my temporary companion was talking to one elder, his companion, a new elder from mexico with a thick accent said "Sister, can you talk?"....Knowing very well that I could, I was confused by his question and said "Yes elder ,I can talk"....he goes on "Well, will...will you...will you talk to me?" Oh that poor little Elder, I had to keep in my laughter because I knew he was working on his english but it was just the funniest way to have started a conversation. He later expressed how on his first day in the mission he remembered role playing with me, and he was so amazed with how fast I could talk. He said "one day I will talk as fast as you! I can do it in spanish, but not in english"...one day elder, one day. 

The work goes on here in the CFM! I know every experience I have here is preparing me for something great the Lord has in store for me. I love my mission, but I love the Lord even more for calling me to the work!

Love,

Sister LeStarge. 

You're Stuck With Me Forever

GOOOOD MORNING!

I've gotten in the habit of saying that as I run the streets in the morning, but most times people just look at me like I'm a nut. Anyways! I had probably most sacred spiritual moment on my mission this week. I got to see the Calaways (the family I taught a year ago) get sealed! It really was the most beautiful thing in this world. I've always had a testimony of families being together forever, but witnessing that just solidified my knowledge. Having never seen a sealing before it was really neat.

     Sister Sims (my trainer) was able to fly in for it, which made it even more special for me because I stink'n love that girl!!! We along with two other couples from Dry Creek were able to attend (not even the poor sister who drove me was invited in). It was so small and so perfect. We sat and waited for the couple to come in, and they were sealed together first as husband and wife for time and all eternity!!! I balled the whole time! What a sweet thing to see those to be sealed! I consider them to be my mission parents so it was really a tender moment. Their children were then brought in and sealed to their parents. Again, another touching moment to see a family I love and hold so dear to me come together, and be sealed. When the whole family was together I sniffled and sniffed, the just sobbed! Mostly because of how wonderful it was, but partly because of their missing family member who I also love so dearly. At the end the sealer did invite them to do all they could to get their whole family to join them as a sealed family, so I found comfort in that. In the end everyone was balling and just so filled with joy and the Spirit. I'll never forget the mother embracing one of her daughters, and with tears in her eyes saying "You're stuck with me forever!" They're all stuck together forever! What a wonderful day. I'm so blessed to have been able to experience all of this!! How many missionaries get to teach a family, see them enter into the waters of baptism and then a year later witness their sealing?! Not too many!! I love this family. I love the gospel. I know that family relationships can last through all eternity with nothing to break their bond. 

Love you all! (forever!)

Love 

Sister LeStarge

Families are Forever

Temples and Samoans

Oh Hey! 

This week has been such a bittersweet week in my mission!! After being called to be a trainer and receiving my new companion (Sister Maukeni from Samoa) I realized that as I train her in her first 12 weeks (a fairly new program all missionaries go through) I am counting down my own 12 weeks of my mission! Though I'm SUPER excited to be a trainer, I'm also a bit sad as my own mission comes to a close. However, I don't think of that often because I've made a goal that I WILL NOT be a trunky trainer!  With that, I have the MOST AMAZING Trainee!! Sister Maukeni is the greatest!!! She's so fantastic! I see a lot of the missionary that I was in her when I first came out, the only difference is that she is FAR more humble than I. I believe she'll be so much more than I ever was as she continues on in her mission. I've been praying she'd have a desire to be exactly obedient  and she's proven to be! She follows every rule I've notified her of, with no sense of attitude or complaint! On her first full day in the field we stopped to get gas. I explained that typically I would pump gas and she would go out and contact people. She first expressed feelings of anxiety but with a little encouragement was sent on her way. I watched as she approached the first person she saw... she knocked on a car window, waited for the man to roll it down then proceeded to talk to him! I know missionaries that have been out far longer than her, and don't have enough courage to do that!! I was expecting to have her come back and report to me what happened, but instead she walked right on to the next person and the next person! How wonderful is she! We have also seen a plethora of miracles come as we've been working on our finding. We've been welcomed back into several homes and even taken it to the next level by inviting members to come with us to our follow up appointments. She is a greater example to me than I am to her, and I am grateful she has such great faith, which challenges mine to greater heights!

 I had the opportunity to attend the temple twice this week!! How blessed am I to have a temple so close to me in my mission!? Very blessed! I love the temple! It's the greatest place ever! This week I got a call from the family I got to teach and watch be baptized, they informed me THEY'RE BEING SEALED IN THE TEMPLE!!!!! AHHHHHHH!!!! Best.Day.Ever! Not only do I get to see my adopted family be sealed, but my trainer is flying in to come too!!! I"M SO EXCITED! This is what being a missionary is all about! This is that joy thats talked about in the scriptures! It's the greatest! Not many missionaries get to experience a family go through that whole process! I'm so very blessed to have had such wonderful opportunities in my mission! 

I love you all!

Kia Kaha!

Sister LeStarge

Time to step up

Oh Hey!

  It's that time again, Transfer calls have come and past and I made it through another round in my area (not like I was going anywhere with my companion leaving and all...). This time though I was asked to be a trainer! Sup, Sup, I was asked to step up! I'm super excited because what better way is there to stay focused than training? I know the Lord will guide me to help this new Sister fall into place in the CFM.

 LeStarge Siblings! If you've got any tips for me let me know!

Sorry this one is short! 

I love you all! 

Sister LeStarge

Snakes, Baptisms and Goodbyes

Well hello again! 

This week was pretty epic with so much going on. I feel like my mission has been put on ultra speed these past few weeks. With a new area, president leaving a new one coming and 2 baptisms theres been no time for dilly dally!

  This week while in a lesson my companion met her worst enemy! All transfer she's been killing spiders for me (as they're a fear of mine) finally I asked her "Sister, you're so brave! but I want to know what you're afraid of?" She replied "snakes", a creature I feel like I'm not too particularly frightened of. While sitting in our investigators house, trying to answer some questions our investigator had, regarding the Word of Wisdom we heard a crash behind us. I looked back to see the DVD player and surrounding movies scattered all over the floor. Right in the middle of the pile, alive and moving, was a snake! Feeling a little stressed, my companion jumped to her feet and took several steps away from the area, while I moved to the edge of my seat. The investigator informed us he knew the whole time that the snake would get out and might try to come near us...a little warning might have been nice, don't ya think?...after moving the snake back into it's home, I notice that the table the cage was placed on was not actually a table, it was an even larger snake cage! Filled with an even larger snake! let's just say for various reasons my companion and I will not be going back to his home....

We had a wonderful experience with our investigator Ivy, who was baptized this weekend!! Her husband is a member, coming back into activation in the church and they have a 7 year old son. It's the best feeling ever to unite a family into the gospel!! Her baptism was small (she's pretty shy) and so perfect for her. We were able to have a small lunch in after, where she told us the baptism was all she expected it to be and more! It was a perfect day :) however, now we've baptised everyone in our teaching pool! We've got to get to work finding more of the Lord's children to bring into the gospel.

For the past few weeks we've been anticipating the departure of our dear sweet mission president. The day has finally arrived for him to leave! I've been so blessed to have the same president for the bulk of my mission and I shed a tear or two for President Gelwix and his wife as they left. He is such a powerful president who has taught me what no other person could have taught me, exact obedience. His diligent teachings of basic principles have instilled in me how important it is to abide by the rules the Lord has set, with no exceptions. How I love President Gelwix :) I will miss him. 

Kia Kaha in the CFM!

Love, 

Sister LeStarge